


bars and hollow bones

by moriphyte



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drinking, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Gen, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Physical Abuse, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-05-31 22:10:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6489286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moriphyte/pseuds/moriphyte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“She flinches when you touch her, it is a conditioned response from a life of battered nerves, and you can’t imagine how it is that she can still ask you to wrap your arms around her, when so many other arms have been cages.”<br/>-Am Kennedy, Bars and Hollow Bones<br/> <br/>Terezi is trapped in a cage of bruises and cigarette smoke and Karkat is going to help her get out</p>
            </blockquote>





	bars and hollow bones

**Author's Note:**

> It's raining out, I'm listening to The Killers  
> and I've got to be at work to open and I can't sleep. I'm just going to go to Sonic get some french toast sticks and coffee and sit in the parking lot.  
> This is shit, I'm shit and I feel like shit. I just want Terezi to be happy.

You're so tired

The walk home from the club is cold one in your skimpy club dress and you walk close to Gamzee to keep warm, holding your bare, scared arms tightly

Gamzee slings his arm over your shoulder and pulls you against him. You shiver both from the cold and the disgusting feeling you get when he touches you but you take hold of his arm and lean your head against him anyway and try not to think about it. In your other hand you hold your heels and your bare feet are cold on the dirty concrete of the sidewalk.

You look down at your blistered feet with chipping purple nail polish on the toes and push a little closer to Gamzee. You hear a lighter strike and you don't have to look up to know that Gamzee is lighting a cigarette. You smell the smoke moments later and the familiar scent makes you kind of queasy, or maybe its just all the alcohol Gamzee forced down your throat. Yeah, it's probably that.

You didn't want to drink, you didn't want to go to the club, you don't want to do much of anything anymore, but Gamzee made you. Gamzee makes you do a lot of things.

When you get to your apartment building you climb the steps to the dingy hallway and walk to your apartment. Outside the door Gamzee stops and turns to you, keeping his arm around your shoulders as he bend to look at your face. You don't meet his eyes.

He take's one last drag of his cigarette, blows the smoke in your face and puts his cigarette butt out on the skin of your shoulder. 

You give a cry of pain and jump back, pressing your hand to your burning shoulder. "What the hell Gamzee!?" you yell, glaring up at him. 

He shrugs and tosses the cigarette butt to the ground, "you needed some wakin, girl"

"You just putt a cigarette out on me!" you yell

"Baby girl" he says calmly 

"What?" You demand 

"Shut up."

He roughly presses his lips against yours and shoves you back against the dirty drywall of the hallway

"Mmm!" you try to say, pushing at his chest. Instead he puts his hands on your hips and presses you harder against the wall, pinning you with his body.

He breaks the kiss and holds your face in his hands, breathing his hot, disgusting breath on your face. "You look so hot in that little dress"

You glare up at him, taking in his scarred face and greasy hair as he grins down at you with smoke stained teeth. "Shut up"

You grab his shirt and pull him down to press your lips to his. He tastes like alcohol and cigarettes and you feel sick but you keep kissing him because at this point you don't care. You don't care how much he treats you like shit, you don't care how every time he touches you you feel disgusting, you don't care about anything. So you keep kissing him because why not, it fills the emptiness inside of you, at least for a little.

So you let him keep kissing you as he moves you against the door, fumbling with the key in the lock behind you. When the door unlocks you stumble inside and kick the door closed behind you.

You don't think about being quiet. You don't think about the boy sleeping on your couch. Because with a drug fuzzy head and the distraction of Gamzee's hands you don't even stop to remember that he's there.

You're usually so carful 

Gamzee's breath is heavy in your mouth as you stumble into the bedroom. He pushes you back onto the bed and crawls on top of you, continuing to kiss you roughly.

As his hands move up your sides in your skin tight dress he starts to kiss your neck and collar bones. When he comes to the place on your skin where he burnt you he stops, letting his warm breath touch your skin which only makes it burn more. He presses his lips gently to the burn and you wince, tightening your hands in his hair.

He keeps kissing your neck as his hands move over your arms. He stops on your left arm and moves his hand back down to feel the cuts and scars on your skin. You go still, afraid to move as he moves his lips back to yours and wraps his hand around your wrist, rubbing his thumb against your skin. 

"Gam-" you say, trying to pull away

He ignores you or maybe he doesn't even notice but his hand tightens on your wrist 

"Gamzee-"

He presses his fingers painfully tight into your skin and you let out a cry of pain against his mouth

That was supposed to shut you up but you're not going to let it.

You pull away from him, wrenching your wrist from his grip 

"What was that for!?" 

He smiles and tips his head to the side, brushing his hand against your cheek, "I like it when you scream" 

You glare up at him and tighten your hands in his hair, hoping it pinches, but don't say anything. You ignore the pain in your shoulder and the pain in your wrist and let him kiss you again. 

You let yourself go numb as he runs his hands along your sides and kisses bruises into your skin. At some point he pulls his sweat sticky shirt over his head and throws it somewhere in the mess of a room. You look up at him where sits now, looking down at you, chest bare and a grin on his greasy scarred face.

"You know what Ima do, baby girl?" he asks, tipping his head to the side like he's trying to get a better look at you

You shouldn't even respond, you know it's just going to be some crude fucking joke but you do anyway because fuck it 

"What, Gamzee, what are you going to do?"

His grin widens revealing a mouth full of teeth stained yellow with nicotine, "Ima fuck the fuck out ya"

He kisses you and you kiss back, laughing against his mouth, "that doesn't even make any sense"

"The fuck it don't! We gettin our fuck on, two fucks fuckin together as one fuck, it's a goddamn motherfuckin mirical, sister" he says against your lips

You laugh, "Yeah that's big talk shut up and get on with it"

He pulls back from the kiss and looks at you, smiling in the dim room, "can fuckin do, baby girl" He leans down and kisses you, this time more aggressively and starts to press you harder against the bed. He fists his hand in your hair and pulls and his hold on you is so tight it hurts

At first it's nice, it's a distraction, a way to loose yourself and not think but as you keep kissing him you're starting to feel sick like you might throw up and you try to pull back but he persists in kissing you 

"Wa- wait" you say, pulling back just enough to speak

He doesn't stop and tries to kiss you again but you push him away, "wait- stop I-" 

He ignores you and shoves your hands off his chest, pinning them at your sides as he kisses you again

"Stmmp, mmm, Gmmzee" you try to pull back but he wont let you 

You feel the nausea in your stomach start to rise and you struggle underneath of him

He finally pulls back and looks at you in confusion, "what-?"

"I said stop!" 

"Oh baby girl don't be like tha-"

"Get off!" you yell, struggling desperately under his weight, "get off!"

"Well I would if you would quit-"

"Not like that you ass, get off of me!" you yell, shoving him back roughly 

He grunts in surprise a falls back, toppling off the bed onto the floor and smacking his head on the bedside table 

"What the fuck!?" he yells but you aren't listening, instead you're running to the bathroom and dropping to your knees in front of the toilet. You grip the sticky toilet seat and wretch violently into the bowl

When you're done emptying your stomach you just sit there trying to breath through the sour smell and taste of your own vomit until you're grabbed by the hair and yanked back 

You fall hard to the sticky bathroom floor, catching yourself on your elbows. You don't have time to say anything before you're being hauled up by your hair.

"Let go!" you yell, clutching at where a hand is fisted in your hair. Gamzee ignores you and instead flings you back onto the carpeted floor of the bedroom.

When you look up at him he is standing over you, anger on his face. There's some blood smeared on the side of his face where he must have hit the bedside table

"Gamzee what-?"

"Shut up!" he yells, kicking you 

You cry in pain and curl in on yourself 

"Fuckin bitch!"

"Stop! I'm sorry, I-I got sick I-" you stutter but he cuts you off 

"I said shut the fuck up!" Then he's on top of you, pinning you to the ground

You struggle beneath him, kicking and pushing against his chest 

"Will you quit your movin!" he shouts, grabbing your wrists and pinning them against your chest 

"Stop it Gamzee! What are you doing!?" you yell, looking up at him desperately 

"I said shut up!"

"Stop it! let go, I'm leaving" you say, trying to wrench your wrists from his grip

"No you ain't, your little ass is gonna stay right here, I'm not done with you!"

"LET GO!" 

He cuts you off by hitting you hard in the face causing everything to go blurry, "you think you can get away with fuckin with me!? YOU THINK YOU CAN MOTHERFUCKIN-!?"

"Stop! I'm sorry! You weren't listenening" you yell, "I'm-"

"GAMZEE!"

You both freeze and slowly Gamzee looks up towards the door. You turn your head to see Karkat standing in the doorway looking like he just woke up, eyes wide with shock

Your stomach drops. You forgot he was here

"What the fuck are you doing!?"  

Gamzee lets go of you and sits up, looking at Karkat where he stands in the doorway. His eyes go wide and he jumps back, scrambling off of you.

Karkat looks between you, horrified

"Terezi? A-are you okay?" Karkat asks

"I-" 

"Shut your mouth!" Gamzee yells, lurching forward and shoving his hand over your mouth making you literally bite your tongue. You taste blood. He leans in close to your face and snarls, "I don't want another fuckin word out of your pretty little mouth! This is your fault, if you would have shut the fuck up we wouldn't-"

"How the hell is this her fault!?" Karkat yells, interrupting him

Gamzee looks up at Karkat, "you shouldn't a seen this best friend she-"

"Seen what!? You fucking beating Terezi!?"

Gamzee opens his mouth to answer but Karkat shoves him back hard, taking his weight off of you

Gamzee curses and Karkat grabs your upper arms, pulling you to your feet. You stumble back and hold onto him, unable to look away from Gamzee.

"Karbro-"

"NO! FUCK OFF!" Karkat turns to you, "come on Terezi we need to go-"

"YOU AINT GOIN NOWHERE!" Gamzee yells, suddenly on his feet and reaching for you 

"Lets go" Karkat says, grabbing your arm and running for the door

"GET BACK HERE BITCH!" he grabs your dress and yanks you back but Karkat keeps hold of you 

"Let go Gamzee!" you yell

"I'm not doin shit!"

"I said LET GO!" you scream. You yank yourself from his grip and you hear fabric rip but you can't find it in you to care as you run to the door pulling Karkat behind you 

You hear Gamzee screaming from the bedroom, running after you, "WHERE THE FUCK YOU THINK YOU GOIN!? GET BACK HERE!"

You reach the door and yank it open, stumbling through just as Gamzee reaches the door

"TEREZI!" he roars, lunging for you but without even thinking you slam the door hard, right on his face

Behind the door you hear him curse and scream in rage 

"We need to go" you say, turning to Karkat as the knob of the door turns, "now"

You pull Karkat down the hall just as the door flies open and Gamzee stands with his hand pressed to a bloody nose

"FINE, YOU AIN'T WORTH THIS YOU LITTLE SLUT! YOU'RE SHIT YOU HEAR ME, FUCKIN SHIT!" he screams 

You don't listen, you just keep running, taking the stairs two at a time 

When you reach the door you push through and stumble outside into the cold. You don't feel the cold of the concrete on your bare feet or the pain in your body as you run, just Karkat's hand in yours

You don't know how long you run but when Karkat finally pulls you to a stop you're vision is blurry and you're gasping for air. Around you lights are bright and hazy and you see Karkat, leaning down to look at you. He's yelling something but you can't hear him, your ears are ringing and everything is shaking.

Karkat looks around desperately but the street around you is deserted despite the noise coming from the bar you stand in front of.

"Come on" he says, taking you by the arm and pulling you into the alley next to the bad. He stops and holds you, lowering you to sit on the cold ground and dropping down in front of you 

He's talking but you still cant hear him, so you just watch his mouth move and listen to the ringing in your ears

"Terezi"

"Terezi!"

"TEREZI!"

You jolt as everything snaps into focus and you see Karkat's face in front of you, full of pain and concern

"Can you hear me? Are you okay? Terezi?"

You grab his arms and look at him. He looks at you and takes a shaky breath, "are you okay?"

You nod slowly, looking down at your bare legs and then back up at him, "...yes"

"Oh thank fuck," his eyes fill with tears and he pulls you to him, hugging you painfully tight, "thank fucking fuck"

You freeze for a moment, unable to move before slowly hugging him back. You bury your face against his neck and hold him as tight as you can.

For a moment you just sit like that, holding onto each other, the only sound the noise from the bar and Karkat's sobs against your shoulder.

When he finally calms down he lets go of you and leans back, looking at you through puffy eyes, "Terezi- what was, what did he, are you-?"

"Thank you" you say, cutting him off

He just looks at you, "are you okay?" he repeats

This time you actually take it in, your still singing face, the soreness at the base of your neck. When you move your head to look down at the bruises starting to form on your left arm you feel the pinch of the burn on your shoulder. 

You only realize that you're shaking when Karkat puts a hand on your arm. You jump, looking up at him in something like fear because for a second, just a second, you thought it was Gamzee.

He pulls his hand away quickly, looking at you worriedly. "Terezi..."

"I'm okay" you snap, turning your head away from him

"Terezi no you're not" he says

You clench your teeth and glare at the ground, "you don't know"

"Terezi whats going on?"

You look up at him suddenly, "what the hell do you THINK is going on!?" you yell

Karkat looks taken aback, "I..."

Your stomach twists when you see his face, "Karkat I-I'm sorry" you say, hugging yourself and looking back at the ground 

"I don't know why you're apologizing to me" he says 

You look up at him, "because, you shouldn't have had to see that, he-we we didn't want you to-we didn't want-"

"You didn't want me to know" he finishes 

You lower your head and nod. You feel like you're going to get sick again

"Why did you think I would be upset or something?" he asks

"Well aren't you?"

He gives you an incredulous look, "of course I'm upset but it's not about you two being together, I'm upset because when I walked in you were crying and Gamzee was screaming at you.

You wince, "it wasn't that bad..."

"Are you serious Terezi!? LOOK at you!" he says, gesturing to where you sit bloody and bruised in your torn dress, your hair a mess and your bare feet dirty.

"It's been worse..." you start but he cuts you off 

"Yeah, which is why I'm upset, I don't even want to think about what could be worse than this"

You bite your lip at the memory of 'worse', or really, memories 

You shake your head, "it's okay Karkat"

"No it's not! He can't treat you like that, how can you-?"

"Thats just how it is okay!" you say, lifting your head to glare at him. When you see the pain on his face you quickly look down, "I can't do anything about it"

"What the fuck do you mean you can't do anything? Leave him!" he yells 

"It's not that easy!" you cry, your voice cracking 

"How is it not that easy!?" he yells 

"Because I-he-" your voice cracks, "because he's right"

You look down and tears starting to fill your eyes, "I'm not worth anything"

He looks at you with pain on his face, "is that what he made you think?"

You take a shaky breath and tears start to drip from your eyes, "he didn't make me...I already thought it"

"Terezi...you-you're amazing, you're the best person I know, please...don't think that. Look" He stops and puts a hand on your shoulder, "I know I can't make you think good things about yourself, trust me. I can't make you do anything but please, don't let him hurt you because of it"

You clench your teeth and start to shake. You try to breath but you can't, "I-" 

You choke on your words and then you're sobbing. Karkat holds you as you sob in that alley. He holds you while you walk to him and Dave's apartment. He holds you as you curl up in him and Dave's bed wearing one of Dave's shirts and he holds you until you fall asleep.

You're so tired

 


End file.
